Orthogonal to the Point

I am a hippie, religion junkie, bisexual, philosopher, writer, reader, massage giver, folk music fan, volunteer, blondie, cat lover, mess creator, ice cream consumer, bath artist, rebel, melancholy ballad singer, occasional teacher, improv comedian/actress, plant grower, bleeding heart, passionate debator, scifi addict, puddle jumper, compulsive cook, painter, nurturer, Jew, friend, creativity initiator, and lover (but sometimes a fighter, too).

I make mistakes, and I try to learn from them. I sometimes hurt others, and am sometimes hurt by others, and I try not to shut up about either case. I believe there's great value in examining and owning my experiences and my feelings, and also great value in examining and owning my actions. I rarely (if ever) know for certain what is "right," but I believe that only gives me more room to grow and learn. I'm trying to remember not to let Principles trample over the emotions of my friends or myself, which has happened sometimes in the past.

It is really, really hard to get to the point where lessons learned in my past are sources of gratitude and joy instead of sorrow and pain. Sometimes, I'm there. It's a good place to be, when I can manage that level of peace.

I am incredibly lucky to be married to the marvelous hakamadare, with whom I am often quite sappy. We had our Jewish wedding on April 10th, 2005 (aka Rosh Chodesh Nissan, 5765). It was an absolutely wonderful wedding, the best I've ever attended, with lots of amazing collaboration by our friends and family. Together, we bought the most wonderful house in Porter Square, Somerville. I'm sure the sweat equity we're putting into it will one day be worth the effort. I hope.

I am also a big ol' geek. Fandoms include Firefly, Babylon 5, Battlestar Galactica, Dr. Who, Dead Zone, House, Monk, and the three STARS -- Stargate, Star Wars, and Star Trek (Next Gen and DS9, mostly). I've also recently gotten into Criminal Minds, Grimm, and Once Upon a Time. Beware, I may love my Tivo more than is healthy. I also have a soft spot in my heart for such cinematic gems as Antonia's Line, Anne of the Thousand Days, Short Circuit, and Sliding Doors.

I am known by many names and nicknames. My "real" name is Crystal. My Hebrew name is Chaiya Miriam. In the Society for Creative Anachronism, I'm known as Lady Tamar bat Reuven, occasional leader of the peasants of Carolingia. In Arisia circles, I helped start and ran the Massage Den for many years, then progressed up the ladder until I became the Arisia 2011 conchair, a huge undertaking that I couldn't have managed without the backing of all my friends and a significant number of acquaintances. 2012 is the year I'm conchair of Readercon 23! :)

Btw, CHAIYA is pronounced "khi-yah," with that gutteral "kh" back-of-the-throat sound Hebrew has. Chet-yud-hay. It's usually transliterated (spelled) with "ch" in English, but the sound is NOT the ch in cheese.

I usually only friend the LJs of people I know in person, these days, and sometimes not even them. There are far too many people I know on LJ! I feel guilty when I can't at least skim my entire friendslist, and I try to use LJ as a way of nurturing meaningful interactions, so if I don't think that's what you and I have, I may not have you on my flist. If this is something you want to talk with me about, please feel free to email -- chaiya at vecna dot org works. Anyone can feel free to add me to their flist. If you're on my flist, then you can find my contact info (and a few other stats) here, in an flocked post. You can also give me YOUR contact info in this poll. Please do, in fact!

My Amazon wishlist can be found here. I try to keep it reasonably up to date. Usually. If you are looking for a gift for me, though, please don't spend money unnecessarily. Used books are good books, and a good method of recycling. Speaking of which, have you heard of Book Mooch? It's an awesome community/addiction feeder. Check it out! I'm Chaiya there, too. :)

I need to go into that "manage tags" thingie and sort myself out. Sometime soon.

Favorite Quotes:

"To live on as we have is to leave behind joy, and love, and companionship, because we know it to be transitory, of the moment. We know it will turn to ash. Only those whose lives are brief can imagine that love is eternal. You should embrace that remarkable illusion. It may be the greatest gift your race has ever received." Lorien from Babylon 5

Hostes aliengeni me abduxerent. Qui annus est? (Aliens abducted me. What year is it?) Sorry, I took years of high school Latin.

"If you're looking for a pretty picture, look at her. If you want to know the truth, look at me." Rose Cousins (Pale Love)

"So let faith fall on me now
I’m gonna be my own best friend
If you do not see me bend
Then you will know I have been brave dancing" Rachael Sage (Bravedancing)

"White and black, straight and gay, boy and girl:
whites kill blacks, straights kill gays, boys kill girls
Protestant and Catholic, Arab and Jew:
Where were you born, which church do you go to?

It comes down to who we love,
it comes down to how we love,
not where we draw the line." Randall Williams (Draw the Line)

"Me, I want dessert first
And a butterscotch baby to hold me tight
I want a life-size chocolate version of you
I'm praying with all of my might
I'll wake up this'll still be true" Edie Carey (Disco Ball Heart)

"I'm moving through this world, in some ways fast, in some ways slow.
I've already been where I was; where I'm going, I don't know.

There's always someone there to tell you
Who you are and who to become.
There's nothing better than knowing where you stand
With you, yourself -- the only one." Lindsay Mac (Barbies & Broncos)

"Every star at night is a beating heart
That someday will fall
Young and old, they are bright
And make a grand exit

And I know life is uncertain
Nothing's turned out like we planned
And I want to do something...
I want to do something...
Maybe just hold your hand." Ellis (Grand Exit)

"And if you must put me in a box, make sure it's a big box
With lots of windows
And a door to walk through
And a nice high chimney" Dan Bern (Jerusalem)

"I just want more than one membership to more than one club, 'cause I owe my life to the people that I love." Ani DiFranco (In or Out)

"The dirt road became a dance floor
The fiddle played so sweet
They were quite a sight
His scuffed up boots and her bare feet ..." Drew Nelson (True and Fine)

And here's one of my favorite quotes from my friend lyonesse: rule one for a pleasant life: don't hang around with people who make you feel like shit.

So, having read all of this, you might have a reasonable idea of what my LJ is like -- eclectic, opinionated, and often highly personal. Also often musical. I believe the unexamined life is not worth living. If you read my LJ, particularly if you're on some of my more personal filters, prepare to be along for the ride when I bring out the microscope. ;)